The art of letting go

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    One of the most important things to learn in life is letting go and moving on. It sounds so simple, but people have very big problems when it comes to situations in life where the best, and only way to solve your problem is to move on.

    Examples of situations where you should apply it

    Relationships

    This is the most important one, where many people decide to hold on, when in reality the battle is already lost. It is very hard to apply, since we are emotional beings, many times we get swayed by our feelings. Especially when we have a long history with the person, or if it is your own family.

    Let’s say you are in a relationship for years and have a baby together. Things begin to crumble, you argue much more than before, the baby is the center point of your lives. The relationship dynamic changed, you don’t have that much time together, both of you have changed. You start thinking to yourself: “I will pull it through, for my kid, we will make it work.” You try to change things, but your partner doesn’t meet you half way.

    Relationships change through the years, people grow at different speeds. A baby can change a relationship drastically. Sometimes it’s better to go separate ways, and you both will be happier that way. I am not saying when things get tough, get divorced. When you feel like you are trying to save the relationship, and the other person doesn’t show any effort, it’s time to reconsider and move on.

    Another great way to look at it is, you got a blessing out of your relationship – a baby that you both love. So that is something that will always connect you.

    Family

    When you have a family that is toxic and doesn’t support you, criticizes you for every mistake, it’s not as simple to just let it go and move on. If you are a teenager, you have no choice but to tolerate it. Get into sports or stay in the library daily, so you are less at home. Try to survive and remember one day you can get out. I wish I could give better advice here, I don’t have the answers. Save up money if you can, and move out as soon as you can, cut all ties to your family and never look back. Don’t let your family guilt trip you for being “cold”, “distant”, “ungrateful.” Cut all ties and move on.

    Decisions

    We all have to make decisions in life, mistakes will happen. People start regretting very bad decisions, which is a vicious cycle. Learn to accept your bad decisions as a lesson for the future. Repeating the same mistake twice, that’s where you should draw the line.

    You bought a very expensive car, you got weak, and the dealership convinced you into buying it. Now you are sitting at home thinking how stupid you were. Take the car back to the dealership and beg that they take it back. If that doesn’t work, sell the car and eat the loss, better a few thousand in the hole as paying off the whole car.

    You opened up a business, CORONA hit, and business profits were cut in half. You can’t pay your operating costs, so you have to shut down. Furthermore, you took out a loan of 30.000 $. Now you are in debt for 30k for multiple years. In the following scenario it is very easy to fall into the mindset: “What have I done, I failed completely.” It is very easy to blame yourself for situations you could not have predicted. Look at it as a lesson, you tried your best, the circumstances didn’t line up this time. Even if you made bad business decisions, and your company went bankrupt. Look at it as a lesson, take your losses and move on. It is very hard to do in situations where you really messed up, big loss of money, got fired from your job.

    The point of this whole post is – everyone makes bad decisions in life. Some are bigger, some are smaller. No matter the damage done, take your losses, learn from your loss and move on. Living in regrets, or beating yourself up for past mistakes, will never bring you a peace of mind.

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